I realized something today...
There's always someone in your past who will help pull you through the rut you are in... despite the fact that you created gaping holes in their's back then.
Experiencing new lows and hoping to relive brighter days, I caught up with an old friend of mine (Fortunately, we're still friends after all the crap I dished out).
On asking what my friend thought of me, I was promptly given the following retort...
"You're a good person... on a very wrong path."
No other answer would have been truer...
[Thanks... Im sorry for putting all that shit for all these years. A lot of repair work to do, eh?]
Another individual I was particularly close to often described me as "a Sheep in the garb of a Wolf!"
I would snort and guffaw at the description back then... What a dick!
It takes two people saying more or less the same thing to get to me... Way to go Tubelight!
Of course I am going to call everyone who I believe is a "close friend" and interrogate! Get ready with your lists - no holds barred. Kill me! :P
(Arpan Singhal not allowed!)
On a serious note, I suddenly seem to have my plate too full - with things to think of:
I need to get rid of my Pessimism ("In sooth, I know not how I caught it, found it, or came by it. What stuff ’tis made of, whereof it is born, I am yet to learn. It wearies me" - sorry for mangling your lines Bill, but no one could say it better than you)
The strategy I adopted to achieve my goals, needs to be reworked apparently.
My priorities (which had gone for a toss) need to be re-aligned to the larger goal I had set for myself years ago.
I need to stop putting my career on the line for pleasure! (Don't ask me about this one!)
The resiliance of my system as a whole was in question for a bit. But that seems to be up and working again.
My defense mechanism needs to be overhauled. Defense = Offense from now on.
Whoa! All that's practically like creating a new human being out of me.
Quarter Life Crisis they call it, right?